Mila’s Cock Review:

Hey, baby. I’m so glad you decided to ask for a review! I really needed a good laugh, and boy did I laugh for a long long time at you and your cock. First things first, your testical situation. What is going on there? Here is a small list of things that your ball sack reminded me of upon being unfortunately exposed to it:

1. A crumpled half-full grocery sack containing two molding and deflated oranges.

2. A very much abused and tragic punching sack that has lost a majority of the stuffing

3. A wrinkly and discarded cum sock filled with a couple golf balls

4. One of those fucked up little flying lemur things (attached is a picture for comparison)

5. 

   A flap of raw and half rotted beef

Moving on from your disgusting flappy ballsack, Your cock situation is not any better and in fact may be worse (though I don’t know how much lower we can sink considering the standards for what we’ll review are apparently so low they’re limbo dancing with the devil in hell). The first thing your cock made me think of was an exploded kielbasa sausage with the meat just half-coming out of the tube, oozing out. Unfortunate, but it was the only thing I could think of seeing your uncircumsized cock. Your length could almost be considered adequate if it were not for the girth reminiscent of, again, a kielbasa sausage. Your dick kind of reminds me of a Nerds rope, with how weird and droopy it is, and it would probably taste just as sour. From a medical perspective, the redness concerns me. Not to mention, I didn’t know balls could be that color. Do you think it could be a fungal infection? Not that I would be able to tell the difference between that smell and the smell of what is assuredly some gnarly dick cheese. I feel like I should tell you that I had to come back to that sentence a couple of times because the idea of putting your dick in my mouth made me almost throw up.

You look like you have the erection strength of a foam pool noodle. Do you think your wife lies to you when she talks about how big and hard your cock is? It was really nice of her to let you out of your chastity cage long enough to take this picture. Question: Does your wife fuck other men that can actually get hard in front of you, or does she do it behind your back and you pretend not to know where she’s going? Or are you just not man enough for her to let you watch? Whatever the case, there’s no way your cock is satisfying her. Quite frankly, I’m not sure what you’re getting out of it either. It cannot be fun flailing your barely stiffened rope of a penis in the general direction of your wife’s pussy. She either deserves a Daytime Emmy for her performance pretending to enjoy it, or your self-esteem is so tragically low that you’ve agreed to a half-open relationship. I’ll sign off by saying you really should have thought harder about that prenup, and say hi to your wife’s bull for me. 1/5

mila

BITCHESRATINGCOCK.COM

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GIRLS GIVING HONEST OPINIONS YOUR DICK!